that's right...only 14 days till baby #2 is here!!! and let me tell you...i am one excited lady. i am pretty well DONE with being preggo. the swollen feet, gigantic belly, heartburn and inability to get a full nights sleep due to having to go to the bathroom every hour have worn me out! i don't quite remember it being like this last time. i have gained slightly more weight this time around (like 5 lbs) but i don't see how that could be making it this much worse! and most of all, i am ready to know if i am bringing home a baby sister or a baby brother for isabelle (though if it is a brother i don't know what his name will be!). but like i have said before, while i am ready to be done being pregnant, i don't know that i am ready to have another baby! and the things i am concerned about seem to be multiplying.
during this past nine months, i have never really thought about whether or not i will love this baby as much as isabelle. i think that is something parents struggle with when they have another baby. maybe i would have worried about it if it wasn't for my sister who told me frequently that you just do, your heart just does, God just gives you that ability to love the same HUGE amount for each kid. but i am concerned about other crazy things. like what if i don't think this baby is as cute. i mean have you seen isabelle? have you met her? she is freaking adorable. and she gets more and more adorable every day. yesterday when i told her it was naptime rather than run in her room like she usually does she just laid down in the floor and pretended to be asleep. it was pretty cute. worse than the thought i won't think this baby is as cute is the thought that i might think it is cuter! or what if this baby isn't as easy as isabelle was. trust me, i have been praying about this one. isabelle has been pretty easy all the way around. sleeping has been pretty easy, switching from breast to bottle was easy, from breastmilk to formula was easy, getting rid of the paci was easy and she has a pretty easy going personality. this kid could easily be more challenging than isabelle. and i DO NOT want that! i also think about what isabelle's reaction to a new baby in the house will be. we spend the entire day together and have a lot of time for just isabelle and mom. bringing home a new baby will most definitely change the amount of time i have to focus just on isabelle. while part of me is convinced that she will adapt to a new baby just the same as she has adapted to everything else, part of me worries she might not be so happy. and those are just a few of the things i think about during the day when the thought strikes me that in two weeks i will have two kids to take care of, not just just one. luckily i only have 14 days left and then a whole new level of craziness can begin!