Thanks for all the great comments from Part One. Raising toddlers is not an easy job and mainly I feel I have learned things through trial and error. Hopefully some of my failures will mean your success! And as always, I would like to state, that while I realize not everything I do will work for every family, I do believe that what I do will work for the majority of families.
1. Establish a schedule. Or a routine. Something that resembles a schedule or routine. I realize that not everyone is routine or schedule oriented. However, children are. They thrive on routine. Now I am not saying that you should schedule your days down to the minute, but having a general time for things like meals, snacks, naps and bedtimes helps your children remain seemingly normal during the day!!! I was at a MK appointment recently (at 7pm) and there was a 2yr old asleep on the floor. The mom informed me that he would sleep for a couple of hours and then wake up and be awake until 2 or 3am. Then he would sleep until 8am and take a random nap during the day and start the process all over again. This is not good! Children need sleep. For their brains. Seriously. Look it up if you don't believe me. Not to mention, but I can't imagine what his behavior is like during the day. My girls get ULTRA crazy and cranky during times when they are tired or hungry. In fact, if Molly cries during the day it is usually because I have missed a snack time. Want to see Isabelle go crazy? Just come over on a night when it is later than her bedtime and she is still awake. Routine and schedule are important. Make one and get your kids on board. It won't happen overnight, but it will happen and you and your kiddos will both benefit.
2. Don't be afraid to discipline. I am not going to go into detail on how I discipline my girls, but if you want to know some books that have helped shaped my parenting I would be happy to share! Here's the thing. You must have rules. Not everyone is going to have the same rules, but you must know what you will and will not tolerate and stick to it. You can't tell your kids one day not to stand on the coffee table and then the next day let them stand and jump on it and not say a word. That is confusing. Decide if you are going to make that a rule or not and then enforce it. Children need boundaries and the parent who lets them get away with everything is doing them a disservice. There are rules that as adults we must follow (called laws) and teaching your children how to obey authority early is easier than trying to do it when they are teenagers!
3. Work on learning something new every day. I am not saying that everyday your toddler will learn something amazing, but you should work on something everyday. At our house I am working with Isabelle on recognizing words and shapes. She is also learning to keep her hands to herself and off of her sister!!! With Molly we are learning new signs everyday and practicing colors. She is also practicing using utensils and putting together puzzles. You can work with your kids on any number of things, eating with utensils, drinking from a cup, colors, letters, shapes, sign language, animal noises, picking up toys, whatever. The point is, help them to be learning something. I realize for some moms this goes without saying. You are busy teaching your kids all day long, but for others I think this is important to mention. Don't trust Barney, or Yo Gabba Gabba, or Sesame Street or whatever TV show your kids watch to do all the teaching.
I realize that these tips may seem easy or like they should be assumed by all mothers, but they aren't. Remember that mom I mentioned earlier? I don't think she is trying to harm her child, I just don't think anyone ever told her how to be a good parent, or showed her how. I think that happens a lot of the time. People simply don't know what they should be doing. I hope my tips can help a few moms out there!
What tips do you have about schedules or discipline? What are you and your kiddos working on right now? I would love to hear!!
We thrive on routine, and have since Sophie was tiny! Our days flow so much better {and we less cranky moments} when we stick to what works!
ReplyDeleteWe are currently working on sharing - and the last few days have been full of breakthrough moments for Sophie. Bella is working on learning words and numbers :)
We are routine people here! And have been since day 1. I knew if there was ever going to be any rest with twins, they needed to be on the same schedule. They are. Our newest adjustment has been that now that they are sleeping through the night (PTL!) their nap schedules have changed. I have learned to prompt, but largely let them show me what their schedule needs to be. It has been 10 days of adjusting, but now they are back to 2 naps - just at slightly different times and for shorter duration. I find that it may take longer, but is so much easier if I'll just be flexible and figure them out with each new change instead of trying to conform them into the schedule I think they need to be on...within half hours, that is, I'm still the Momma. :-)
ReplyDeletegood point, e! parents should not be so rigid that they do things just for the sake of a schedule. being flexible, but consistent is important!
ReplyDeletei have never been an organized/scheduled person, we do have a general time for things like eating and sleep but the rest of the day is random play with some tv mixed in.
ReplyDeletewhile i was in my first trimester of my second pregnancy PBS was a Godsend, especially with no family thay could help or friends close by.
naptime has always been an issue with my oldest as she stopped napping at around 15 months, she stays up for 12ish hours and sleeps 12ish hours. now that daughter #2 is in the mix we are adjusting again to teething and crawling and general older sister distractions.
on top of all that my hubby's sch is extremely random so that plays a huge part in how our days differ week to week.
it's crazy but it's us.